Practical Ways to Support Kids Who Struggle with Executive Functioning

Key Insights

• Executive function describes a set of mental skills that we use every day to plan, organize, monitor, meet goals, and control our emotions and impulses. These skills are not only important for school but for social and emotional success.
• Executive function skills develop from early childhood into the mid-twenties.
• Executive function skills can be strengthened by practical strategies including routines, step-by-step guidance, and visual aids such as checklists.

What Are Executive Functioning Skills?

Have you ever noticed how some children often forget their homework, lose track of tasks, or become frustrated or upset when plans suddenly change? These issues often stem from difficulties with executive function, which are a set of mental skills that we use to plan, organize, achieve goals, and control our emotions and impulses. These skills are not just crucial for school but for everyday life and social interactions. Whilst there is some disagreement over the list of executive functions (for example, some psychologists see emotional regulation as a separate function), some widely cited functions include the following:

• Perseverance: Sticking with a task even when it feels hard.
• Working Memory: Holding onto and processing information, like remembering the steps for a mental math problem.
• Organization: Keeping school materials and schedules in order.
• Task Initiation: Starting work independently without the need for constant reminders.
• Focus/Attention: Maintaining concentration even when faced with distractions.
• Self-Control: Managing impulses and emotions, for example, waiting for your turn, thinking before speaking, or staying focused in class.
• Cognitive Flexibility: Shifting between tasks, cope with changes, or seeing problems from various different perspectives.
• Time Management: Using time efficiently and accurately estimating how long a task will take to complete.
• Planning: Breaking down goals into smaller, actionable steps.
• Self-Monitoring: Reflecting on progress, checking work, and adjusting as needed.

Whilst children with ADHD or learning differences may find some of these skills more challenging, there are many ways to help those who struggle with executive function skills. 

How Executive Functioning Skills Develop

Executive functioning begins in early childhood and develops rapidly through late childhood and adolescence. These functions are controlled by the prefrontal cortex in the brain, which does not fully mature until the mid-20s or even later for some.

As we age, executive functions help us to:

• Stay focused and resist distractions;
• Control our impulses and emotions;
• Organize and plan tasks;
• Adjust when faced with changing rules or situations;
• Make decisions and set goals; and
• Learn from our past mistakes.

Understanding the different developmental stages of executive functioning skills can help parents and educators set realistic expectations and provide appropriate support for children at each stage. For example, you wouldn’t expect a 5-year-old to sit still and focus on homework for 30 minutes without taking a break. This is the kind of mismatch that’s likely to cause frustration for both the child and adult. A more realistic expectation might be that the child focuses on a task for 5–10 minutes with guidance, movement breaks, and adult reminders. 

Why Executive Functioning Skills Matter for Learning

Children with executive functioning difficulties, including many with ADHD, tend to be more disorganized than other children. For example, they might require more time to get dressed for school or become overwhelmed by tasks with more than one step. In contrast, children with more developed executive functioning skills tend to do better both academically and socially.

Practical Strategies to Strengthen Executive Functioning

Here are some actionable ways to help children develop these skills:

• Build Perseverance: Praising effort over outcomes and breaking big tasks into smaller, achievable steps can help motivate kids to complete tasks.
• Strengthen Working Memory: Memory games, such as Shopping List, can help kids improve their concentration and recall. Asking kids to repeat back instructions, or summarize what they’ve learned, also helps to support their working memory.
• Encourage Organization: For children with executive functioning difficulties, it may not be obvious what needs to be done to complete a task. This is where checklists, such as for the morning routine, can be handy for defining tasks and making them feel more achievable. Colour-coded folders and tidy workspaces also help kids stay on top of tasks.

• Support Task Initiation: Timers, routines, and step-by-step instructions help kids get started without wasting time and energy on indecision and procrastination.
• Improve Focus: Set up distraction-free zones, such as a low-sensory workstation, and use short, timed intervals to gradually build their attention.

• Build Self-Control: Games like Simon Says or waiting exercises help kids practise managing their impulses.
• Foster Flexible Thinking: Encourage problem-solving by brainstorming multiple solutions to everyday challenges, for example, asking kids two ways to solve the same problem.

• Teach Time Management: Create exercises that require kids to work out what tasks need to be done first and what tasks can wait or might even be distractions, and then to practise finding out how long it takes to complete each task.

• Strengthen Planning Skills: Help kids to map out the steps before starting projects and to anticipate obstacles.
• Practise Self-Monitoring: Model to kids self-monitoring questions such as, “Did I finish everything?” or “What could I do differently next time?”

Bottom Line

Executive functioning skills like perseverance, working memory, and organization, are essential not only for school, but also for friendships, and everyday life. With practise and engaging activities, parents and educators can help kids develop these abilities and support them to succeed now and in the future.

For parents and educators seeking hands-on support, my ADHD Executive Functioning Bundle is a practical solution that covers many of the above areas. With over 200 resources, including executive function cards, scenario cards, printable posters, worksheets, and more, it provides structured, engaging ways to develop executive functioning skills.

 

 

 

Photo by: Kaboompics.com: https://www.pexels.com/photo/child-in-beige-hoodie-leaning-forward-on-table-feeling-exhausted-while-studying-6958532/